RANDOM THOUGHTS ON GETTING WHERE YOU WANT TO GO
PART 2: THE DIRECTION
We shall not cease from exploration.
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.
--T.S. Elliott
Who are you? What do you want from life? What is most important to you? These sound like pretty simple questions, and yet their answers form the basis of your life plan. Take a moment to expand your thoughts a little and look very carefully at your life. What do you see?
A large company recently evaluated the money they spend on building construction, in hopes of curbing serious problems of cost overruns on projects. They presumed that increased costs on building projects were the result of poor estimating before contracts were let. What they discovered, however, was that the estimates were done correctly; The cost overruns were actually due to inadequate analysis of the needs of the prospective occupants of the buildings. Too many budgets were being exceeded by additions and changes during design and construction. Ironically, those executives who were most critical of the costs, were those who ultimately could have influenced the accuracy of the estimates most directly.
Asking yourself about yourself is vital to every other part of your life. And while it's important to be honest in your self-evaluation, it's a very good idea to give yourself the benefit of the doubt.
The story is told of a farmer who had a horse who couldn't work in the fields. The horse was strong and spirited, but it wouldn't settle down to pull a plow. Frustrated, the farmer sold the horse to a stranger from a neighboring town, and bought a sturdy work horse. He was happy. He could never have known that the stranger won thousands of dollars racing his discarded pony.
Give yourself some credit. Others may overlook your potential. You, however, must be your own best fan.
Why did early man leave comfortable villages to venture across the oceans? Did an insatiable curiosity burn within them, like the home fires they left behind? A simple desire to know what lies just out of sight has generated most of the significant geographical and scientific discoveries of our civilization.
And why did so many of the world's population endure often unimaginable hardships to travel to the so-called "New World?" If you were to read the diaries of those who made this journey (something I'd recommend to anyone desiring a new perspective on modern life), you'd note that the reasons for the trip are nearly as numerous as those who made it. Some sought wealth, others adventure. Many were "pushed" toward America by religious persecution or economic disaster. Regardless of circumstance, the single common thread binding all of these voyagers together is one of motivation--Everyone who succeeded in making a (voluntarily) journey to America did so because they were motivated by their dreams of a better life once they arrived.
Motivation is the key to unlocking your potential. Either positive or negative motivation--if it is strong enough--can push you to do virtually anything. For once you lose sight of what you really want, staying "motivated" to achieve your goals can be difficult indeed.
Must we change? Is it necessary to discard that with which we are so comfortable for something we hope will improve our lives? Architect Kevin Lynch claims that "an environment that cannot be changed invites its own destruction." He says he prefers "a world that can be modified progressively against a background of valued remains, a world in which one can leave a personal mark alongside the marks of history."
Have you ever heard someone say in dismay, "I didn't plan for that to happen?" Change is inevitable. If we are to succeed, our positive reaction to that change must also be inevitable. The prevailing theory surrounding the disappearance of the dinosaurs centers on the large beasts' inability to adapt to a changing climate.
I think you'll agree that change is good, as long as it improves your life. Change of any kind breeds stress and discontent; But unnecessary changes--especially those we make ourselves--can plague our lives with difficulty.
As with most things in life, the problem isn't a willingness to change, it's simply not knowing what changes are important. At times like this, I recall three words spoken repeatedly by the late Bruce Lee to students of the martial arts:
"Don't think. Feel!"
Too many people say that decisions must be quantified to be correct. There is some truth in this (e.g., when planning family finances). But numbers can never take the place of individual wisdom and experience. Try raising a child "by the numbers." There is much to be said for "feeling" in making decisions. And the way you feel about what you do is crucial to your success. Decisions we make in life are quite often "right" because the "feel right." In most cases, we never know what may have happened in our lives, only what did happen. And if we look back and say "it felt like the right thing to do," it probably was.
You'll recall the scene from the film, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, where Robert Redford's character is asked to prove to another man that he can handle a gun by shooting a small stone thrown on the ground. When Redford tries to draw and fire the gun from the hip in his usual trademark style, the man grabs his arm and scolds him: "Don't move around. Just stand there and shoot." A reluctant Redford aims stiffly and fires, missing the stone entirely. The man laughs loudly and begins to walk away when Redford says calmly, "Can I move now?" The man barely has a chance to turn around before Redford leans to his side, whips the gun from its holster, and fires repeatedly from his hip, hitting the stone every single time and driving it fifty yards down the street.
Planning, in a sense, is a proactive reaction to change. Change is inevitable. Rather than trying desperately to keep your life just the way it is, while it is being tossed and damaged by waves and storms, try looking a little more closely at what you want from life. It may be that there are modifications you can make in the way you react which will allow you to keep moving in your chosen direction.
I've always been fascinated by the skills of sailors and sailplane pilots who can take whatever breeze nature chooses to give them and use it to get where they want to go. By carefully watching what goes on around you, much as a sailor watches for the telltale signs of a windshift on the surface of the water, you can turn even unexpected events to your favor. All it takes is a little practice--and the right attitude.
PART 2: THE DIRECTION
We shall not cease from exploration.
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.
--T.S. Elliott
Who are you? What do you want from life? What is most important to you? These sound like pretty simple questions, and yet their answers form the basis of your life plan. Take a moment to expand your thoughts a little and look very carefully at your life. What do you see?
A large company recently evaluated the money they spend on building construction, in hopes of curbing serious problems of cost overruns on projects. They presumed that increased costs on building projects were the result of poor estimating before contracts were let. What they discovered, however, was that the estimates were done correctly; The cost overruns were actually due to inadequate analysis of the needs of the prospective occupants of the buildings. Too many budgets were being exceeded by additions and changes during design and construction. Ironically, those executives who were most critical of the costs, were those who ultimately could have influenced the accuracy of the estimates most directly.
Asking yourself about yourself is vital to every other part of your life. And while it's important to be honest in your self-evaluation, it's a very good idea to give yourself the benefit of the doubt.
The story is told of a farmer who had a horse who couldn't work in the fields. The horse was strong and spirited, but it wouldn't settle down to pull a plow. Frustrated, the farmer sold the horse to a stranger from a neighboring town, and bought a sturdy work horse. He was happy. He could never have known that the stranger won thousands of dollars racing his discarded pony.
Give yourself some credit. Others may overlook your potential. You, however, must be your own best fan.
Why did early man leave comfortable villages to venture across the oceans? Did an insatiable curiosity burn within them, like the home fires they left behind? A simple desire to know what lies just out of sight has generated most of the significant geographical and scientific discoveries of our civilization.
And why did so many of the world's population endure often unimaginable hardships to travel to the so-called "New World?" If you were to read the diaries of those who made this journey (something I'd recommend to anyone desiring a new perspective on modern life), you'd note that the reasons for the trip are nearly as numerous as those who made it. Some sought wealth, others adventure. Many were "pushed" toward America by religious persecution or economic disaster. Regardless of circumstance, the single common thread binding all of these voyagers together is one of motivation--Everyone who succeeded in making a (voluntarily) journey to America did so because they were motivated by their dreams of a better life once they arrived.
Motivation is the key to unlocking your potential. Either positive or negative motivation--if it is strong enough--can push you to do virtually anything. For once you lose sight of what you really want, staying "motivated" to achieve your goals can be difficult indeed.
Must we change? Is it necessary to discard that with which we are so comfortable for something we hope will improve our lives? Architect Kevin Lynch claims that "an environment that cannot be changed invites its own destruction." He says he prefers "a world that can be modified progressively against a background of valued remains, a world in which one can leave a personal mark alongside the marks of history."
Have you ever heard someone say in dismay, "I didn't plan for that to happen?" Change is inevitable. If we are to succeed, our positive reaction to that change must also be inevitable. The prevailing theory surrounding the disappearance of the dinosaurs centers on the large beasts' inability to adapt to a changing climate.
I think you'll agree that change is good, as long as it improves your life. Change of any kind breeds stress and discontent; But unnecessary changes--especially those we make ourselves--can plague our lives with difficulty.
As with most things in life, the problem isn't a willingness to change, it's simply not knowing what changes are important. At times like this, I recall three words spoken repeatedly by the late Bruce Lee to students of the martial arts:
"Don't think. Feel!"
Too many people say that decisions must be quantified to be correct. There is some truth in this (e.g., when planning family finances). But numbers can never take the place of individual wisdom and experience. Try raising a child "by the numbers." There is much to be said for "feeling" in making decisions. And the way you feel about what you do is crucial to your success. Decisions we make in life are quite often "right" because the "feel right." In most cases, we never know what may have happened in our lives, only what did happen. And if we look back and say "it felt like the right thing to do," it probably was.
You'll recall the scene from the film, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, where Robert Redford's character is asked to prove to another man that he can handle a gun by shooting a small stone thrown on the ground. When Redford tries to draw and fire the gun from the hip in his usual trademark style, the man grabs his arm and scolds him: "Don't move around. Just stand there and shoot." A reluctant Redford aims stiffly and fires, missing the stone entirely. The man laughs loudly and begins to walk away when Redford says calmly, "Can I move now?" The man barely has a chance to turn around before Redford leans to his side, whips the gun from its holster, and fires repeatedly from his hip, hitting the stone every single time and driving it fifty yards down the street.
Planning, in a sense, is a proactive reaction to change. Change is inevitable. Rather than trying desperately to keep your life just the way it is, while it is being tossed and damaged by waves and storms, try looking a little more closely at what you want from life. It may be that there are modifications you can make in the way you react which will allow you to keep moving in your chosen direction.
I've always been fascinated by the skills of sailors and sailplane pilots who can take whatever breeze nature chooses to give them and use it to get where they want to go. By carefully watching what goes on around you, much as a sailor watches for the telltale signs of a windshift on the surface of the water, you can turn even unexpected events to your favor. All it takes is a little practice--and the right attitude.
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